Right then…

Right then, this is a hard post to write…

No, I haven’t fallen off the face of the earth; and I apologize for the delay in posting.  I have so much to tell you, but will save that up for future posts.

In the meantime: I think I was feeling a little blah after my show.  I spent so much time first thinking and planning it, then making work and promoting it – that  when it was all said and done I felt like I had nothing interesting to say.  As well, I set up the light box and spent a lot of time photographing all of the pieces that needed to be photographed.  That takes a lot a time, boy, does that take a lot of time.

Then, on the evening of Dec. 14th my Mom went into the hospital.  I spoke to her on the 15th, as well as the Doctor.  I spoke to the Doctor again on the 16th – her COPD had caught up with her and they were doing the usual things they do to get oxygen into her blood.  At noon of the 17th the Doctor knew what they had tried wasn’t working and he told me “if you want to be here at the end” we’d better get on a plane.  We dropped everything, found a kennel that could take the cats (luckily), cancelled my friend’s Christmas visit, and booked a flight for the next morning 7 am.  Then, at about 7:30 pm our (EST) time on the 17th, the Doctor phoned back to say my Mom had died.

The good part of this story is that she had her faculties until the end, and was able to tell the Doctor that she didn’t want aggressive treatment; and she didn’t linger and suffer.  We should all be so lucky to be in this position at the end of our lives.  She told me about a year and a half ago “I’ve had a good run”.  She also told me she was going to hold on until I finished school – I keep thinking about that.

It really wasn’t until last week that I started to feel back on track.  Grief works it’s own way and on it’s own time.  Even though I have been thinking about writing this post for the past two weeks, today is the first day I definitely decided to open wordpress.  And yes, this has been very difficult to write.


My Mom and I at the top of the Malahat.

I’ve been plugging away slowly on a commissioned piece, which I will show you – but not until after Valentine’s! As I said at the beginning – I have lots of things to talk about and plan on being back on track!  As a hint – there is color involved and new pieces(!) of equipment!

I’ll be back soon.

Take care,


8 Responses to Right then…

  1. Sending Prayers & Hugs, lost my Dad a few years ago Dec. 21. It does get better with time, I think your getting back to your regular schedule will help a lot. Just remember to take good care of yourself as you transition through the grief process.

  2. I know the feeling and the amount of grief it brings. I lost my father 14 years ago but I never forget him. He is with me each time I feel I am creative and an art lover. The gone person who has taught us anything, specially a father or a mother, is always with us through their transmitted knowledge. It stays and goes on from generation to generation. Keep getting stronger and there is no shame to feel the blues.

    • Thank you very much Bethania. I agree with you and certainly have been reflecting over the past months how much my Mom (particularly) taught me. The care she took was really an outstanding gift.

  3. Valerie…I’m very sorry to hear about your mom.
    After I lost my sister suddenly in August, I really began to feel the depth of grief. I’ve never lost anyone that was there my whole life and it’s still very difficult to live with the fact that shes gone.
    I can honestly empathize with you and hope you find comfort in your memories after the sorrow subsides.
    Your mom was indeed fortunate to be able to make the decisions she made in the end. A quiet peaceful end is what we all wish for isn’t it?
    She looks like a sweet person.
    I recognized the Malahat summit in the background…such a lovely spot for a photo of you both.
    Take care.

    • Thank you very much Kerry. I felt so bad when I read (on your blog) about your sister – but I just didn’t have the right words to say how sorry I was.

      You’re right, my Mom was a hit with my friends and my partner! We were lucky to have a sunny-ish day on the Malahat for that photo!

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